I use "we" as a multiplicity of Self. This is not advice unless you chose it to be so. It was channeled from the collective realization experience, and not just a personal story. Please substitute whatever pronoun feels good to you.
I want to introduce a concept in here. Choosing broadly what you want to experience, AND allowing it to come into being.
It seems at some point in the iterations of expansion of Self, we are able to choose various state of being and move into them without a pause or break in experience. Yet, if you nor I are not "there yet," there's another way, for now.
For example, back in August I felt, for me, a heavy burden holding a year-long lease on an apartment and having to hire a dog sitter in advance of being able to travel freely.
Without going into the details, I stated that I would like to choose freer way of living without being tied to a home, without being tied to a dog sitter.
Then the fears came in - not having a steady place to live, fearful for my dog's safety and security. Panic ensued to a small degree. This time I watched it with childlike curiosity.
Then PAUSE, allowing it all to come forth. I was panicked AND I knew it was all absolutely perfect. My heart did not skip a beat, my breath remained steady.
Fast-forward, or throw the car into reverse, rather, I am sitting here at 2:30 a.m. free to move about the world and my mom volunteering to take my dog at any time, and enjoying a cohesive relationship with her.
Yet in the last six weeks or so of choosing this experience, I had to allow karmic ties to unfold and re-wire, especially surrounding my mom. That was not pretty from the outside - holy crap - but from within, I was so enjoying the awareness of watching it all unfold, to come into being.
I allowed the fears of being without a home base to surface and dissolve within me.
I allowed more of myself to come in, which is the scariest part of all. The scariness is the perception of being alone. The more I let Self in, the more lonely it can feel...which ended up not being my truth, yet was so palpable at the time. Still the knowingness sat on the sideline watching it all unfold. And, the human was aware of this as it moved through. The NEW-ness!
As I sat back, relaxing on an Oregon beach on a beautifully sunny day, I watched the perception shift from total ALONE to completely and unwaveringly supported by everything and everyone. I did nothing. I held no thought. I simply watched the energy move around to serve me, like the changing tide in front of me.
But often in this allowing and the "scary" stuff that comes in, we say, "oh no, I messed it up," when really everything is coming together to support that beautiful CHOICE you or I made if we just get out of the way!
So often we hit the panic button and try to go back to the old choice that feels so much safer to the limited piece of ourselves - when if we just took a deep breath, allowed all the junk to rise to the surface it would clean itself out to present the choice wrapped in a surprising package for the CHOOSER (you/ me) to claim as a gift from SELF.
Additionally, a lot of us, previous me included, only take the deep breath or sigh or relief when we reach that sweet spot called being, when everything becomes NOW and there is no past or future.
(Perhaps previously or now) We "power(ed) through" allowing the CHOICE to come to be. Allowing these old stories or fears to come to a sort of resolution or peace is (was) quite daunting.
How many times have we put on our proverbial headphones and said, "wake me up when it's all over!"
What if we chose an experience, and enjoyed the ride of allowing it to come into being-ness?
What if we allowed this to be the experience of the creator in its creation, allowing the perceived chaos to form into the next iteration of expansion, the next iteration of the expanded self?
Instead of saying, I'll really be fine when all this is taken care of and I come into this new state of awareness or being-ness (human addiction to the future) - what if we were just okay in the ride of allowing that is the vehicle for this chosen state of being?
What if instead of suffering through a big shift in consciousness, we watched in childlike delight as it all moves through and lands in a new time and space? The free space.
In realization, this becomes instant. I am still in allowing on occasion, and I am also aware and enjoying it. As a result, it moves with ease (and quickly in linear time!). That's one example of the 'energy serves you and you don't even think about it anymore' state of being.
For me, BEING is defined as of perpetual becoming. A place of peace with what is, without past or future anything, of knowing you are the creator in your creation, without even having to think about it or repeat it like a mantra.
A creation of being within Self beyond the noise - not without noise but simply moved beyond it in pure consciousness. No headphones needed.
Being is a state without fear of the unknown or linear future or decisions based on past experiences - the old cause and effect linear modality of living.
Being is a place where we don't question our motives or more so ourselves and states of consciousness. A place to be in the expanded iteration of Self.
What if we enjoyed understanding in full awareness HOW we came to be, not just when we came to be, or what we came to be?
What if we used the sense of focus to play in how we created New Life for ourselves and not just on the linear outcome? There is no destination; nothing is static in the ever-dynamic state of being more and more of ourselves.
A state of constant motion, free from an identity to grasp onto or even more so - defend, we mold and shape freely to allow the maximum state of joy to permeate every single experience no matter how small.
Perhaps we already are 'there', and simply appreciating allowing is that extra icing on the cake?
In honor of you and your unique experiences,
Lauren and Sar'h
Sar'h, pronounced SAR-RA, is a name given to the body of unique wisdom that makes up realization, and creation in this new life. OO-SAR-RA. More on the BIOS page.
I hope you all are enjoying the sway into the holiday season. Whether you’ve walked out of mass consciousness or still find yourself in it, sometimes you cannot help but allow some of that spirit to sink into your body of consciousness.
These days I am enjoying so much the freedom to swim into the collective human consciousness or other group consciousness and back out, at will, along with many other layers and dimensions of sensations and realities.
I find myself in constant motion of allowing realities to move through me in maximum expression and experience of joy – the joy of being!
Washing my cars, talking to the gas station attendant, putting my toes into the sand, a smile from a neighbor, well, everything is just a rich sensational experience these days. The little things are no longer little!
It wasn’t too long ago that I found the holidays to be the absolute worst time of year, a deep sadness spreading over me from the end of November into the first week of January. If you find yourself in that space, please know you’re not alone and that this too shall pass.
I know how annoying that sounds, too, but it does pass! If I could give myself one bit of advice back then, it would be: allow yourself to experience the sadness fully, without resistance; take a walk, a drive, or a swim and just let it in, knowing later you will see the richness of wisdom that comes from it.
In the next few days, I am off to Costa Rica for round one of surfing and then back again in January for another round. I am enjoying Texas this time of year.
Recently, Damian and I traveled to Italy, Slovenia (seeing many of you!) and then back to his home in Poland. After that, we crossed the cosmic Southwestern United States, stopping at many national parks and hot springs. Then we arrived in North San Diego County for some great surfing before heading back to Texas.
These days, my home is a storage unit, and I have been living out of a suitcase since September 14th. I cannot foresee future right now – everything is NOW – so the idea of making any decision, like signing a lease or buying a home, is unfathomable. For the first time ever, my brain has relaxed into this being our new life reality – without questions! Woo hoo!
While my true creation is expressing and experiencing my unique realization embodied, I still have my hobby as a writer going, and I am so enjoying it.
I have a new Patreon Series, and I must say it does feel like a truly magical space to write a book about my first year in realization. If you click on this Patreon link, there's a few free articles too if you find yourself idle during the holidays.
Every two weeks, I am posting a chapter of the book for patrons, whose support will help fund the publishing costs and more so provide a beautiful stream of consciousness for the words to flow. Thank you does not begin to cover it.
You can check out more below, but if I lose you first, I wanted to say happy, happy holidays and/ or cheers to allowing whatever experience you find yourself in.
Best to you in linear year 2019! It’s so funny to write these things, yet why not celebrate your humanity this holiday season. In this last life, all things were meant to be enjoyed!
With love and the sensation beyond it,
Lauren Hutton (Sar'h) writes adventure novels and short stories about the self-realization experience.