Yesterday something occurred that I noticed far into the edge-less edges of my being. I’ve seen it before, but I hadn’t noticed how it’s tied to a bigger picture until today.
I’ve seen it in myself many times, and I have seen it in friends. The only way I can see is it – is because I know it deeply from personal experience.
You’re cruising along, allowing deeply your realization – or post-realization allowing your embodiment. You’re really starting to understand your relationship with energy. You understand you are energy. It’s all you and it’s all one.
You start to understand what New Energy is. It’s you as energy meeting the I AM consciousness and coming into one – in a state of no separation – removing the illusory boundary between energy (human + master body of wisdom combined) and the inimitable consciousness of the I AM THAT.
The concepts you read about don’t just sit on a page on the web, or a voice in a channeled recording, they are set in motion within you – let’s call that application.
When I started facilitating groups of people choosing embodied realization, I started to notice a pattern of sorts.
A beautiful being – an individual – would have a massive expanded breakthrough in conscious awareness, and then it would be followed by a shrinking.
A normal occurrence and no judgment, but a replication of a pattern to bring the most creative of senses to – observational compassion. The ‘when you stop trying to change things, they change, just by adding a dash of awareness.’ Observational compassion. For Self.
When you become aware of something, it dissolves in the integration experience without having to do anything – if you get out of your own way.
The shrinking is often represented by a small voice, a doubting, wavering voice and more so completely forgetting that you are not this (image/ identity/ doubter), you are THAT (God/ source/ Pure Awareness with an energetic vehicle).
Nothing new, right?
Well, yesterday, I saw how this operates in a collective. I saw it like a wave of amnesia descended upon the Earth, and anyone who doesn’t have a real clear grasp on the I AM THAT, affected.
I’m sure everyone here can feel when they move from speaking from the I AM consciousness, back into the voice of the little human who forgot everything they knew deep down.
Before crossing the Threshold, this occurred a lot, for me. The bigger the aha! breakthrough, the further back I would be bolted into the amnesia. Exhausting and depleting.
I tended to think this happened on an individual level, and then I realized yesterday watching it, how masters before me, before us, had to grapple with this.
As teachers, they would push their students, first, locating where they were at, and then seeing how far they could open the door for the person to stretch their awareness. Sometimes the amnesia snap back was done deliberately to shake up a deeply rooted pattern.
Other times they chugged along at a slow and steady pace. The rhythm varied and was discerned by the enlightened teacher.
No one ever thought about what this does to the teacher, they are far to consumed in reaching out for enlightenment, and that’s appropriate, until they realize enlightenment was a sign taped to the back of their shirt, and they just needed to reach back and claim it.
I won’t call myself a teacher – facilitator is politically correct in this world. Oh, screw it, as a teacher, I would say this fine line of how fast to go, what doors to open at what time, is a learning curve.
There’s so much I want to put in Patreon, and I take a deep breath and discern with Morya by my side, what I should dive into and what I need to save for later. What must be understood by a majority, before I can add to it. Like allowing – it’s an art, not a science.
Sometimes there is enough qualia, or a reference point, and sometimes there’s not. Eventually qualia is not going to be a thing – you don’t need an analogy, a reference point, or an image, but until then I spend my days dreaming them up and testing them out with Morya, sometimes all day and night long. That’s where your exchange goes.
Yesterday I felt I was a cowboy on a cattle drive. My job is to allow the sovereign steers to roam in a broad direction toward, or reversing into, expanded awareness. It’s a hands-off approach. A beyond respectful honoring of individual sovereignty. I ride in the back.
However, if a sovereign steer wanders off and gets it leg caught in a wire, or another floats down a bustling river out of sight, it’s also my job to help it out, with its permission, of course. Perhaps they chose to float down the river? That’s rarely the case.
Usually, there’s an energetic hand sticking out of the water saying, “Can you give me a lift?” Sometimes that person is simultaneously cussing at me while I’m helping them out. Sometimes they say thank you. It doesn’t matter. That’s okay. I understand.
The steer wants the person with a map to light the way when things get really dark and scary, and then their ego gets pissed at the cowgirl on her horse and says, "I have this, back off."
I can take it, I’m Texan, remember?
So, most of the time in my voided energetic world, there’s two or three people who need a little reminder of the I AM THAT, not this.
Yet, yesterday, I looked out and there were hundreds of sovereign steers – far beyond patron and the Facebook group.
I looked out over the desert everyone must cross to step into the embodied state, and it was in total chaos.
El Morya was forced to put on a cowboy hat (my requirement) and ride by my side.
Usually, he lets me figure things out on my own. He only steps in when something shocks me or I need a bit of extra support. Sound familiar? I’m the steer and he’s the cowboy sometimes, but I’m grateful, not bitter.
“What’s going on, Maourya?” (That’s his Sanskrit name, it comes off as a sensation, a vibration)
“Amnesia wave,” he said, talking to me in my own terms.
So, energetically and sensationally he showed me how I could address the matter as a whole – without having to go to each individual steer.
“Go beyond the perception of chaos and look at the pattern. Now create a doorway to go beyond the pattern,” he said in sensation.
Now, I know that the doorway doesn’t mean all individuals will go through the passageway we opened, yet the few who choose to do will lessen the gravity of this blanket of amnesia that fell upon the desert for the others but choosing it for themselves.
Somehow, I knew how to do just that. Morya let me do it for myself, rather than doing it for me. Doorway created.
Now, I know many of you reading this are wondering what the cure is for this amnesia. And you know what I am going to say – awareness. Consciousness. Developing your relationship with energy. Opening to the sensations and rhythms of the I AM.
The simple words I chose for the passageway are my favorite. These words create.
“Be Still and Know that You are God.”
That’s it. The mind wants some amazing steps and complicated and dramatic moves to attach onto but in the end – the master enters the temple with no effort.
You don’t need to surf this amnesia wave anymore.
There’s the Rumi poem: Half of Life is lost in charming others. The other half is lost in going through anxieties caused by others. Leave this play, you have played enough.
Here’s my version: Half of life is lost in forgetting who you are. The other half is lost in going through anxieties of failing to remember what you are here to do. Leave this amnesia wave, you have surfed it enough.
An invitation to drag your surfboard over to the break called, “Be still and know you are God,” should you wish for a change of scenery.
Lauren Hutton (Sar'h) writes adventure novels and short stories about the self-realization experience and beyond.