Allowing the fight
We are so glad you are here.
This experiential article contains a transmission shared with me (Lauren) in 2016.
It was originally published in the Thirty Days of Self-Love - Spanish version coming soon - in 2017.
However, I am just now feeling its full affects and really grasping the meaning of this Sarah share.
What Sar'h -- she spells it that way for the transmission -- shares with us here is not just about you - the designated ascendee dropping its last sword, in its last lifetime.
She clearly states it is about every single simultaneous lifetime dropping its sword - even mid-battle.
Several SATSANG's ago - I think it was March - I talk about leaning into any and all corners of my consciousness that felt violent. I talk about the burglar (robber) outside my house - that was actually me.
Further, identity labels - even those are violent as well because they create the division of duality.
I'm this and not that...
We are everything and nothing.
You and me - we contain all of humanity.
Let's start to live like it.
The Universality of Shining YourLight.
Here we are almost six years later since I recorded this message, and I am watching in my sleep state, the lifetimes in the far reaches of my universe of Self. Well, they are finally getting the message that all war, all battles are done.
I have the honor as designated Lauren to be able to watch all of this occur in my omni-aware state of being.
What a privilege it is to be alive with the gift of consciousness.
To watch the stories completely unwind and re-write containing all the potentials, possibilities, probabilities and passageways without the ridiculousness of a single perceived outcome.
I cover this fully in the Undefined You Channel in the Era of the Magus Series, if you want more on the topic.
"Go now, you are forgiven. Gooooo." ~ The General, A song by Dispatch (look it up, please)
All with love --- and open arms for any ill-perceived wrong-doing ----
Sarah & Lauren sharing this magical lifetime of all lifetimes together
HERE IS THE ORIGINAL TEXT RECORDED IN 2016 AND PRINTED IN 2017:
As I conclude week one, I thought it would be appropriate to share a message from a facet of Sar’h. For my human self, letting go of all battles has not been the easiest part of self-realization.
Yet, it relates so strongly to self-love to end internal and external battles, I’d be short changing you if I left it out. For me, each time I believed I was battle-free, I took it to a deeper layer for a new discovery – in observation rather than self-judgment.
Sar’h delivered this message and many more to me in 2016. I have been hesitant to share Sar’h’s stories of the incarnation in which she received her name. You see Sar’h has never wavered in her story, insisting she was incarnated as a child at the time of Yeshua and Mary Magdalene.
In January 2017, I made the decision to never hide any parts of myself again. It began with the courageous, or seemingly insane idea, to share what I went through during my awakening process in my first book. Yet, I have realized my coming out of the closet also means allowing Sar’h to share her story in full, without letting my human panic of being found out get in the way.
Additionally, for background important for Sar’h’s message, she says she was born after the crucifixion in Alexandria, Egypt, which is why she calls herself Sar’h of Alexandria. As many of you may know, after Yeshua was hung on the cross, Mary Magdalene and other Yeshua disciples were forced to flee Alexandria, Egypt by boat to head to safety in Southern France.
As Sar’h tells the story, the sails of the boat were shredded in order to stop them from making it to France. There’s way more to the story, but they do make it to shore, landing in Saintes-Marie-de-la-Mer, France.
LAUREN & SAR’H
A Message from Sar’h of Alexandria: Embracing the Dark, Dropping Your Last Sword
Here I am, Sar’h of Alexandria. Here you are in this life, as this human aspect of Self, knowing that there is something so much deeper this life has to offer – more than any other lifetime.
Knowing somewhere inside of you that you are the master that traveled through all those lifetimes, all those experiences to remember who you are once more, to remember who you are the experience of the soul.
Here we are again in human form at the time and space we agreed to meet approximately 2,000 years ago. Those of you who are here today with us, on Earth in human form, were the ones listening to the call, truly living the promise we made to carry on the message – to experience and embody it – The Kingdom is Within All of Us.
You know me as Sar’h. You know me as a daughter of Yeshua and a woman you call Mary Magdalene.
**By daughter, she does not mean a blood born child, but a child of God, who was represented by the Avatar Jesus Christ. A child in consciousness. Sar'h would never debate you on biology for it doesn't matter. **
Some of you were on that boat with me - the one that traveled across the Mediterranean with no sail, with no wind.
Yet, if you recall, through the flow of pure consciousness, we arrived at Saintes-Marie-de-la-Mer, pinching at our skin as we climbed out of the boat to make sure that yes, in fact, we were still alive. The world around us seemed completely mad. It seemed completely insane, and more than anything it was an angry, punishing world.
Everyone who is here, reading this, embodied in human form, you have all done as you have promised. You have shown the world that the kingdom is within.
The ones who had ears heard. The ones who had eyes saw. You showed them not always with words, not always with lessons, but through your actions and your experiences here on Earth. You showed them what it was to have the experience of the teacher and the student, the parent and the child, through your resistance and participation in all that human life has to offer. You were the Roman soldier. You were the disciple. You were the warrior and the wounded.
You hold onto these experiences deep within the cells of your being. You hold on to them as if you can do something wrong. You hold onto the teachings and the promise you made millennia ago to continue to share the word. You hold onto these concepts of right and wrong. But like my father said, “There is no sin. It is you who makes sin exist.”
Even those who are shaking their heads in disagreement, you too hold so tightly onto concepts of right, wrong, duty, and contracts. It is something so buried deep inside you, you have become numb to its existence. You do not feel it anymore. And we all know well enough the only thing that can control us is the unseen – that of which we are not aware.
Let me tell you this right now before we begin. You have fulfilled your duties. You have fulfilled your contracts. You are here again in physical form – this last life that is all for you – for your own experience of crossing the threshold into your own enlightenment. Your own Self-actualization.
Some of you have already done this, and yet you have returned to do it again in the new energy. To share the experience in this new era in which we are no longer hunted down like animals and slaughtered for our beliefs.
Let us all take a big sigh of relief right now. No one here is in danger of crucifixion, of being burned at the stake, of having our children ripped from our hands. We are safe. You are safe. I am safe. We are free. We have always been free.
My mere existence is not a threat so much anymore that my life must remain a secret. People are too busy in their technocratic lives to look up from their smart phones to persecute us. They are too distracted grabbing at illusory power.
We live in a different experience, an expanded plane of existence and awareness - not separate - in not of.
Something my mother taught me so clearly – and much out of necessity at the time – was that you have to embrace the dark to see the light. That is why you often see her (Mary Magdalene) depicted with skull sitting on top of a book.
That is the knowledge you must embody to make this transition your soul calls for each moment of each day.
You know what I’m talking about - that gentle, yet ever present gnawing in your gut that says there is more. This physical world is not it. Once you begin to feel it – for some of you it began many lifetimes ago – you went to search externally for God, then the universe.
You combed through spiritual practices as if your life depended on it.
Yet, just as in religion, the answer was not there in the spirituality either. And you knew enough then – just as you do now – that the answers are inside. They are in the darkness. They cannot be found in the light, the concepts of goodness, and what’s right.
Instead, they lie hidden in the edges of death, yet death is nothing but the illusion created by the vastly unfamiliar.
For some of you, that is all that’s in your present awareness: the answers are inside, the kingdom is within.
“But where,” you ask.
The answer is in death. Of letting go of all that surrounds you. Your family. Your possessions. Your aspects or identities here on Earth. Your human desires for success and the oh-so-popular idea of security.
The answers are in the letting go and distilling the experiences in the depths of your soul, the part of you that can never be taken away, the only place where true stability and security exists.
My mother knew this because everything was taken away from her in the physical world. Her home. Her family. Her friends. Her family’s fortunes. Her human identity as she hid in the caves of southern France after the crucifixion, fearing for the life of her children, her family, her friends.
Everything. Even her own story.
And in the death of who she thought she was - in her darkest hours - she found the truth of her existence in her soul.
She reconciled with the impermanence of human life, the impermanence of everything around her. She let go of the concepts of good and bad and right and wrong. And what she was left with – the I Exist, the I AM That.
The good news is that right here, right now, most of us have not had to watch our families taken away or slaughtered. We do not have to give up our children or fear being strung from a cross because we stepped out of line.
We do not have to give up our wealth or comfortable way of living. We do not have to bear children to carry on our name. Right here, right now, we can simply energetically sever the tie to these concepts without actually having to give them up.
Soul alignment – self-actualization – enlightenment – does not occur in the light.
My mother, Mary Magdalene, is depicted in many statues, like the one at the chapel at Rennes-le-Château, and paintings with a skull on top of a book to remind us we have to step off the edge into the dark – to remind us the growth, the transformation only occurs in the darkest depths of who we are.
Notice she is not carrying around a book with hearts, unicorns, and rainbows on it. It is a skull. In every church depicting her – it is skull.
Right here, right now, we are going to remember that we can move as easily through the dark (the unseen) as we can through the light (the seen).
We can dance in the fabric of consciousness, which contains all, without fear, without limitations. We can use the fabric of consciousness to work for us. We can shape the energy that makes up the fabric into whatever we want.
All that is born, all that is created, all the elements of nature are interwoven and united with each other. All that is composed shall be decomposed; everything returns to its roots; matter returns to the origins of matter. — Gospel of Mary Magdalene
For those of you familiar with the Order of the Magdalene’s, you know it is simply a term for the brothers and sisters who have known the way, who have known the impermanence of everything on Earth, and understood the kingdom lives within – the song of the soul. The silent whisper of the I Am That I Am.
The term Magdalene has been bent and twisted to mean all sorts of things about the people it describes. Right here, right now we are taking it back to its true meaning. We are going to go back to the core of whom we truly are, and I, Sar’h, would like to invite you on an energetic journey inward. Will you join me?
Thank you all so much for having the courage to be here, to read these words from your inner kingdom rather than from your head. I know some of you are terrified of what will happen next if you truly let down your human guard, if you pull down the fence you have built around your soul in the name of self-preservation. Sure, you say you have torn down the fence, but it's not true. You have left a little bit up, created a dam, just in case.
“What it will feel like to let go, really let go,” you wonder. I tell you that courage is not the absence of fear. Courage is experiencing the fear and moving beyond it through action.
Each and every one of you has the brave hearts of both the lamb and the lion. Simply showing up here on Earth in human form is a courageous act, in and of itself, after all the pain and suffering we have all experienced here on Earth. I honor you for your courage. I applaud your bravery.
Before we get started, I want to thank each and every one of you for what you have done for our family, keeping the integrity of the divine mother, as represented by the one you call Mary Magdalene, and the divine father, as represented by the one you call Yeshua, alive.
See, sense, and know my deep and sincere gratitude, overwhelming appreciation for the lifetimes of suffering and secrecy you endured.
Now you are released from the duty. It is no longer your job or my job to carry forth those secrets at any cost.
Here, I am with delivering the message in broad daylight, broadcast on the Internet no less. There is no Roman standing outside my door to nail me to a post for speaking of the unseen, for telling men they are sovereign beings, obligated to no government or external God.
It’s now your time to let go of that duty, that obligation. The message survived. That mission is complete. It is time to simply allow the natural process of realization to occur.
Whew! Now that we have lifted that burden, let’s talk about another one you have been carrying around. Who here has tried to save something in your life? Save the whales? Mother Earth? Supported a political party? Raise your hands.
Lauren here who shares this beautiful body with me spent years as an activist. She worked for an organization that’s motto was fighting cancer. Fighting, yes, I said fighting. She carried no literal sword or shield but she was a crusader.
A crusader is a person who campaigns vigorously for political, social, or religious change; a campaigner of any sort. Instead of armor, Lauren got dressed every day in her power suit, stalking lawmakers to convince them or threaten them into funding cancer research and prevention programs. And, she was good at it. Very, very good at it. In fact, in her time in the Texas capitol, she and her cancer posse managed to bully lawmakers into more than $1 billion dollars in cancer investments.
Lauren was so proud of this accomplishment. So, proud it became part of her identity. That is until she laid watching her father in a coma. It is then by her dad’s bedside she remembered that medicine, the pharmaceuticals, were not what could save her dad. She realized sickness, health, death, and life were decision of the soul. One would not get better unless it was the will of the soul and the soul alone. Divine will.
All of that effort she had placed raising that money that generally went into the hand of the cancer pharmaceutical companies had been nothing more than experience to show her the illusion.
Lauren would walk back into that job each day up until three months after her father died – at his own soul’s accord, I may add – until her soul screamed, no more. This was not the way.
She laid down her sword. She laid down her shied. And for the first time in her adult life, she listened to her soul who whispered unwavering, “There is nothing to fight anymore. Fight only brings more fight. A fighting mentality only makes the cancer stronger.”
And you know and I know that cancer is nothing more than a human experience that teaches us, reminds us how to really live – should we give it the opportunity. So, what I, Sar’h, am asking you to do is to lay down your sword like Lauren did. There is nothing left to save. Not even the Earth. It doesn’t need saving.
Do me a favor, please. Everyone close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths. Feel into where your soul resides in the body. If it is not inside the body, command it back in. It is safe. You are safe. Continue to breathe deeply. Connecting your soul experience with your human experience.
Now see, feel, and know when you played the role of the saver. Not just in this life, but in all lives. Let the movie to play out in your mind’s eye. No thinking. No editing. Allow all the lifetimes in which you were a crusader to flow before you. Continue to breathe. For those of you who are saying right now, I cannot see anything. I ask you to expand your definition of sight. Move beyond the physical definition into that of the sensual one.
Sense every single life – this one included – in which you picked up your literal or figurative sword to fight something.
Allow yourself to feel deeply into the concepts of right and wrong that you held onto so deeply – those concepts of good and bad and light and dark that still exist in your DNA. Allow it all in. There’s nothing to fear. There is no judgment of these lives. Only radical observation mode.
Now as the lives, these crusades appear before you in the absence of linear time and space, see, feel, and know the role you were playing.
See, sense, and know the role you played in your campaign against perceived evil. It could be very old. A long-passed life, but it's still out there fighting evil. Allow it to play out. Allow your full humanity to scream out about what is fair and not fair.
Now hit the pause button on one of your experiences. Maybe it was from this life. Maybe it was from another. Hit the pause button mid-battle. Maybe you were campaigning for peace. Maybe you were saving a child, an animal. Or back fighting the Romans, again. Maybe it is an aspect of you, a demon from within. Whatever it is hit pause mid-fight.
Take a deep breathe. Now in this situation, in this fight, allow your physical presence to become larger. Allow your body to expand. To grow taller. Grow so tall that your head reaches the sky.
Breathe. Observe how you feel different as you look down at yourself in this fight. See, feel, and know how you were playing a role. See, feel, and know how this was simply an experience. An experience that has served you well in the past, yet no longer serves you anymore. Become aware of the parts of you that were still out there fighting, outside of your awareness.
Re-write the story your way. Continue to breathe.
See, sense, and know deeply that this need to fight, the fight itself was only an experience. An experience you took internal when you stopped the external battles. Now go inside the body.
See, sense, and know where the fight continues inside of you. Notice without judgment where that fight lives inside of you. Breathe.
Now you are going to be given an image – a gift from the soul – allow the image to arise from the soul that will show you how to transmute the density of the fight inside of you.
Whatever this image is – it may be a color, it may show you to release something, to integrate something, and it may show you how to heal something, to fill in a hole or create one. Whatever it is – no thinking, no editing – allow this to take place. Allow the vision from the soul, the soul action, to take place.
See, sense, and know how this action is occurring right now. Not later. Not tonight while you’re lying in bed. Right now. Allow the transformation, the transmutation, the healing to occur until you know internally that it is complete.
See, sense, and know that you have no more fight left, that you are complete in this now moment. Continue to breathe as this occurs. Allow your human to sit as the witness as your soul completes this.
Wow! So many swords are being dropped I can hear the dings as they hit the ground. What a group of crusaders we have been.
Drop your last sword. Peel off that heavy armor. Feel the weightlessness of the body. Feel the lightness of the heart.
Sense the ineffable love the soul has for you the human. The gratitude it feels for you the human who went through all those experiences so you could get to this point right here, right now.
Allow any final actions to occur as you continue to breathe. Feel your head, heart, and soul aligned right now. See, sense, and know how natural it feels to be in this alignment.
Now I’m going to invite you to join me, Sar’h, in a choice. The decision is yours to make if you wish. Right here, right now, if you desire, you can choose to never pick up that sword again - it is a choice, a sovereign commitment to yourself to never put on that armor again.
There is no battle to fight. The war is won. The victory is in knowing who we are, who we truly are at the soul level. That we exist. In connecting with the soul – that which had no birth and that which never dies, and contains the knowledge and wisdom of all experiences on Earth and beyond.
Your soul has taken all the wisdom gained from every fight with so-called evil, every fight with so-called dark energies you have experienced, and distilled it into pure crystalline knowledge or Gnost.
All that energy directed at fight has returned to its source, turned back into its natural state, and is there for you to claim anytime.
The masters that you are have transfigured this fight energy – this energy you categorized as light and dark energy – back into crystalline energy, in which the concepts of light and dark never existed.
This crystalline energy is now there for your use, at your will, at any time to create the life you desire. It is available to you at any time and replenishes in abundance, at your will.
You see clearly now – that when you are in the duality of fight, in the concepts of light and dark, you were hindering your creations.
In transmuting the density of fight energy into crystalline energy, we have freed up our creative potentials and possibilities. In dropping our swords, we have picked up our wands, instead, to command the crystalline energies in creation of our realities - in all realms.
In another message, I will remind you how to work with the crystalline energies to create. We will mold and shape it like clay. But for now, let us sit in completion of our last battle.
Go ahead and brush your shoulders off. Stand on the victory mound. Stand tall. There are no victorious souls slouching. Declare victory in knowing your last battle has been fought.
That there were no winners or losers except in realizing that fight is an illusion. The idea that evil existed was an illusion. And in meeting death in your embodied enlightenment experience, you will find, that too, is an illusion.
Take a deep breath. Slowly start to come back into the physical body. Wiggle your fingers and your toes. Slowly open your eyes. Feel your body in complete alignment with the soul.
“All that is born, all that is created,
all the elements of nature are interwoven and united with each other.
All that is composed shall be decomposed; everything returns to its roots; matter
returns to the origins of matter.”
—Gospel of Mary Magdalene*
* Leloup, Jean-Yves. The Gospel of Mary Magdalene. Rochester: Inner Traditions, 1997.
Lauren Hutton (Sarah) writes adventure novels and short stories about the self-realization experience and beyond. She fancies herself a humanizing divinity journalist and shares her work here with the Magus Kuthumi.